When it comes to Black love, I feel like this is the most misrepresentation in the media. When you turn on the television or the radio, you are more likely to see or hear about a Black man having a side chick or a Black woman being cheated on. You rarely see or hear about longevity in marriage or someone appreciating and loving their mate. It’s always the negative that is glorified. I have seen women discuss the norm of being a side chick and this is not okay. Do we really want our younger generation thinking that it is okay to settle for less? That it is not okay to be in a monogamous relationship? That the only thing that comes with Black love is endless fights, cheating, and baby mama/baby daddy drama? Why is this such a normal thing and where are the real relationships in the media?
As I stated before, I have yet to actually turn on the television and see a positive representation of Black love (besides Blackish). Sit back and think to yourself. The only time you see this is either a Black man or Black woman is in love with a person of a different race or the same sex. If you do see a Black couple together, they are bogged down with nothing but lies and cheating scandals. Where are the Huxtables? Where are the Banks? Where are Martin and Gina? I remember watching, “Martin,” and absolutely loving and envying their relationship together. I wanted what they had. Because of the positive representation of Black love that I grew up with, in the media, I am still able to hold on to the possibility that real love exists because it was all I saw. But think about the generation that is being brought up now. What images do they have to look up to? You have a plethora of reality shows that feature mainly Blacks, but when it comes to the relationship aspect, there is rarely anything positive. You have grown…GROWN…women fighting over men who really could care less about them and this is looked at as what you are suppose to do. You have women who are doing ridiculous things and are letting men get away with cheating and having babies on the side because they supposedly “love” them and they are “ride or die”. This is what Black love is turning into and it is absolutely ridiculous! It needs to be brought to a stop before it truly gets even more out of hand. The more that this type of representation is put out in the media for our people to see, the more it starts to set in that this is actually normal. Many people go by what they see and if all you see is this, then how will you know to do differently? If you don’t believe that marriage actually works and don’t see the real positive effects of it on a daily basis, why would you aspire to it?
When Solange and Alan Ferguson showed off their wedding photos, the internet was set on fire. There has never been such a positive image of Black love, recently, than these pictures. They show that real love is true and possible. It is a breath of fresh air in the wave of “break babies” and side chicks. To see such a beautiful experience, coming from two people of color, gave me such joy and hope that people would start to look at Black love differently. We don’t have to settle for less like they portray in the media. We don’t have to date other races to be truly treated the way that we should. Love exists in every single person. The problem is our love is being represented in the wrong way and people are starting to adapt to these behaviors. My generation is still able to remember the great Black families that were seen every day on television. The younger generation does not have that. It is up to us to bring these images back to our community. To show them the power and beauty that is in Black love. It is not always hurt and pain. Our love, Black love, is an amazing and wonderful thing when done properly. We can become so much more as a collective whole if we began to bring this type of love to the light.
Photos Courtesy: http://www.ladylindablack.blogspot.com, www.lipstickalley.com, www.usmagazine.com, http://www.thewritertj.com