Taking a Break: The New Way to Cheat and Get Away With It

Okay, we all know about that dreaded time in a relationship when you just can’t stand the person that you are with. What used to be sweet and cute is now so annoying that you contemplate killing them in their sleep just to have a way out. You love them, but you just can’t stand them. You feel trapped and you are slowly losing yourself in the process. So, what do you do? You take a break. A break which means that you just need some time to yourself to get everything in order. Time to figure things out. “I still love you babe, but I just need some time to make sure this is right.” Now, during this time of immense self finding, when did it become the norm to somehow slip up and get someone pregnant? As we have seen recently from Dwyane Wade and Ludacris, this “break” is becoming a lot more serious then what it used to be. Normally, a break would last a few days in which you and your significant other would make up and be back on track. But now it seems that this “break” is giving men free realm to just do whatever and come back with washed hands. “Baby, you can’t get mad that’s she’s pregnant. We was on a break.” -_-

Now, let’s discuss what should happen whilst on said “break”. The “break” is basically the action before the break up. Instead of just calling it off, the two agree to take a “break” from one another to clear their heads. Maybe they have been spending too much time together or maybe they are feeling unappreciated and need time apart to regain that love. Whatever the need is most “breaks” take place so both parties can decide if they should continue in the relationship or not. Because you are suppose to be focusing on the relationship, most women believe that dating other people during this time is not acceptable. You should be home, in bed, jotting down pros and cons to the relationship, not out bumping and grinding with some hot tender. I mean really if that’s what you want to do then isn’t the whole idea of a “break” just preposterous. Why not just break up? This is why I have never, fully, understood the idea of a “break”. To me, it’s pretty much over if you have to go that route.

But let’s say you take the “break” and you figure out that you can’t be with anyone else but that woman. She is your sun and earth and moon and blah blah blah. You get back together and everything is perfect. Well, except the fact that 9 months later you receive a phone call from that hot tender you were in the club with and you hear a baby crying in the background. (Dramatic, I know. But hey this is my story lol). Now, you have to explain to your sun and earth that while on this “break”, when you were suppose to be doing some self evaluating, you were actually partaking in some risky behavior. While this may be one of men’s worst nightmares, technically it shouldn’t be because you always have that ace in the hole. That “but we were on a break” excuse. TECHNICALLY, she can’t really be mad at you because you guys were not together. TECHNICALLY, you’ve done nothing wrong and she has no right to leave you because it did not happen while you were together. Men know this and I feel like it is about to take on another life of its own. Men know that women are emotional creatures and think irrationally when it comes to love. They know that while the woman has every right to be upset that if he continues to drill it in her head that they were on a “break” she will eventually forgive him because those are the rules. It has happened to the best of us. But what I don’t like is how women just pacify the men when this takes place. It’s like they feel more empowered for sticking with a man who has done them wrong. That’s that Ride or Die syndrome. “My girl got my back regardless of what I do” and she is in the background bobbing her head while feeding his two kids. I’m just saying, some things are just too much.

I, personally, couldn’t just let someone off the hook for getting a woman pregnant while we were on a “break.” Seeing that the whole idea of a “break” is to get clarification on your relationship, I’m not really sure I want to continue being with someone who thought they could find this clarification in between another woman’s legs. And then to be so irresponsible as to get them pregnant. That just makes it worst. Seems to me that they were not thinking of you nor the relationship during this “break” so what is the point of staying with them? My biggest hope is that women stop settling for so damn little. If he can’t respect you enough while you are on a “break” then why would he respect you in a relationship? Being on a “break” does not curve your feelings towards that person. It doesn’t make the love stop just because you guys aren’t technically together. It’s the same thing for those who are in long term relationships but are not married. You still do the same thing that a wife does. Those acts don’t change once you get a ring. There is just a title that comes with it.

My advice to those out there is if you need a “break”, just break up. Or be prepared to take care of someone else’s baby because yall know this is a celebrity trend that is going to spread. “Aww, baby Dwyane did it and look at what Gabby did. She took him back with a smile. If they can make it work, I know we can.” -_-